Dear World,

In light of the recent economic crisis, a study has been commissioned (of which has just recently finished) to analyze the inner workings of one John W. Myers III.  The findings are as follows:

  1. The data was taken over a span of one-month.  Not every day, but when data was available (e.g. the researcher was in his laboratory and the subject was also in the laboratory).
  2. Mr. Myers “makes his music” in a variety of ways, including, but not limited to: “doo-doo” singing, attempted scat singing, humming, snapping, and whistling.
  3. The situations in which one may find Mr. Myers “making his music” can be summarized as follows:  when doing monotonous household activities (e.g. walking down the hall, removing his laundry from the laundry machine, fiddling around in his room, eating dinner by himself, or showering), when there is a general lull in the conversation among people he is comfortable with, driving, or when prompted.
  4. No correlation could be found in this study between Mr. Myers’ Music and the weather.  Neither could there be found one between his Music and days he works.  Nor between when he exercises and when the Music appears.  Nor between whether he spends considerable time outside or not and his “Music-ings”.
  5. The only logical conclusions of (4) can be as follows.  a.  The study was put together such that a clear relationship between when Mr. Myers makes Music and those variables mentioned can not be made.  Or, b.  Mr. Myers makes music regardless of his prior physical activity, the weather, if he works or not, and his time outside.
  6. A further study might be conducted that finds a relationship between the preceding variables and the types of songs that Mr. Myers revels in.
  7. Contrary to Mr. Myers self-report data, his song inventory is rather limited.  Given that it may change slightly with a more longitudinal study (entering into, say, Christmas season, which would produce more Christmas songs), his Music is given below in order of prominence of occurrences.
    • Pirates of the Caribbean (whistling, humming, singing boisterously, followed by laughing at himself at his vigor)
    • Misc. Scat Singing attempts.  Usually followed by laughing at himself.
    • Jurassic Park theme.  Same modes of display as Pirates.
    • Office “Rit-dit-dit-doo”.  Followed by self-laughing.
    • Jingle Bells.
  8. In one instance, it was noted that Mr. Myers was humming Jurassic Park at the beginning of the hallway, and by the time he made it to the bathroom, he was humming Pirates.  This shows a clear inclination toward Pirates over all other songs.
  9. Mr. Myers can be prompted to ‘make his music’ with much ease.

Our conclusion is that Mr. Myers Music is delightful and need continue.  We look forward to the Christmas Season and hope to bring a more longitudinal study forward at that time.

Thank you.

(Raw data can be found on the Doc sheet attached)

The Johnny Myers Project